Birth #0028

This story has been shared with the consent of the birthing momma.

I had the privelege of attend this mother's third birth, and I also had the privelege of attending her second birth (see also birth #003). Lately I have had the opportunity to doula with a mother for a second time. This has been a great honor, and it has been amazing to see how each mother has gained power and strength from the previous birth. With each one she seems more sure of herself, and her ability to do it. Let me share a little secret with you, each mother has this power with her from the start, it sometimes takes time to discover this about herself. BELIEVE in your power to birth your baby. You can do it. Women do it around the world everyday. Without drugs. And have healthy happy babies. : )

Anyway... off of my soap box. Back to this lovely birth story.

I was called by this momma around 2am, a day before her due date. She was apologizing for waking me up, and was telling me that she was unsure if she was "really in labor." She explained that she had been having some back labor since earlier in the evening, and that she was continuing to have contractions now about 10-15 minutes apart. She seemed to be easily talking to me through them, and felt like she couldn't go back to sleep, but she felt bad waking up her husband or calling her family who would be coming from 2 hours away to try to make it to the birth. I reminded her the importance of listening to her body, and that it didn't bother me to be woken up, and that I was sure her family and her husband wouldn't mind either. Because of this mother's relatively fast labor last time, they had resolved to try to make it to the hospital a little earlier this time, just to make sure they would make it in plenty of time. I encouraged her to try some hands and knees position, and maybe even take a bath if it would help her to relax a little, but that above all she should listen to her body about the best time to leave for the hospital. I told her I would be ready for her call. I then laid back down and tried to go back to sleep, but by that point my adrenaline was really going. When she called back about 30 minutes later, I was relieved. She said,"We're going to the hospital now!" I said, "Okay, are they closer together?" She managed to blurt out, "We just want to go in!" I said, "K, meet you there!" and headed out the door shortly.

I arrived at the hospital within 30 minutes. Momma was in the room, smiling and laughing with the nurses. I greeted everyone with a smile, but inside I was worried that she went to the hospital a little too soon, since it didn't appear that labor was that intense yet. The momma giggled and said to me, "Did you hear that I am ready to get into the birthing tub?"  "No," I said, relieved, but still in a little disbelief.  She was open to 9cm. We continued talking and the mom expressed to me that she could hardly believe that she was "really" ready to push soon, since she felt it was so easy. Even as we were talking, she would stop for a contraction, remaining totally relaxed, and breathing easily through the most intense parts of her labor. This momma was a pro at relaxing. Maybe it was because it was her third baby. But maybe, a little more importantly, she could trust her that her body knew just how to birth this baby, and that she only needed to be open to receiving her baby.

The midwife came into the room to see if she would want her bag of waters released. It was at this point that I got a little nervous. What if the first nurse had been wrong? Surely she can't be complete-- she is COMPLETELY and totally relaxed. I don't know why I would have ever second guessed. She checked her cervix again, saying, "Oh, I guess there is a little lip left, but you are a good 9 and half centimeters!" Of course, I could hear myself coaching myself, Its her oxytocin and her endorphins that are helping her relax, and even laugh right through to the end of labor. "If you want," the midwife continued, "You can just let the bag release on it's own in the tub?" The birthing mother agreed, and all headed down to the birthing tub room, where she eased herself into the water and said, "Aah... that feels nice."

Soon I could tell the mother was feeling all eyes on her, and that this was her time to shine, even though she wasn't quite having a strong urge to push yet. I tried my best to normalize the environment for her. Trying to calm the space, so that no one was really in a hurry. There was no rush, afterall. We talked about how their "baby" (the little girl from birth #003 ) had been up all night, despite her usual ability to be such a good sleeper. She had climbed into bed with her momma, laying awake with her, touching her face and her belly. She knew. No one else knew that her baby sister would be coming even before her due date. But she knew. What a special memory for this family!

Soon, the momma began feeling the urge to push. The midwife coached her to allow her baby to slowly come down, so that all of her tissues could gradually stretch out, and so that she could hopefully avoid significant tearing. With just 2 pushes, the head was crowning, and with one more, the baby gracefully slid out into the water, between this momma's legs. She gently scooped up the baby, and leaned back, holding her closely to her chest and gently cooing, "Hi baby... Hi baby. Hi Elsie." It was another little girl. Dad and mom sat close, gazing into baby's eyes. Just taking each other in. It was a beautiful moment.

I loved being with this family again. What a testimony that birth can be easy, and pleasureable when you allow it to happen! This mother later told me that she feels like it wouldn't be fair for her to promote natural birth when her births had been so easy. But I disagree completely. She trusted her body and strength to be able to do it. And she did. That is nothing to be ashamed of.