Riddle me this.

I love this, written by Sarah Honeycutt of Sweetland Doula and Birth Services. It is my job description.

How many doulas does it take to change a lightbulb?



None. We don't actually change the light bulb. We encourage you to change your own lightbulb in the manner you feel is most appropriate for you. We can discuss with you different lightbulb changing methods and help you develop a plan for changing your lightbulb. We offer emotional support and encouragement during the entire process, from climbing the ladder to turning on the light switch to make sure the bulb works, we are there for you every step of the way. It's your lightbulb, your way.

Navigating Newborns.

If you or someone you know is wondering where to find postpartum doulas in our area-- there is a great new group of postpartum doulas in the Twin Cities called Navigating Newborns. Each of the doulas working in this group is independent, meaning she runs her own practice. But the doulas in this group are all certified or working towards certification. You can look at each doulas qualifications/ philosophy but also find the doula with availability to suit your individual needs.

Check it out, and pass on to others in need of an extra boost postpartum.

www.navigatingnewborns.com

My newest job. Postpartum Doula work.

Postpartum is a long word for the time after you have your baby. As a postpartum doula, I still help moms and partners, but in a different capacity than I do in birth. It is a little hard to describe what exactly I do, because every family that I work for has very different needs. Sometimes I hold a baby a lot. Sometimes I help swaddle and soothe, and show mom and dad again some of the things they learned about in their baby classes and how to put it into practice with a real live baby. Sometimes I hang with baby so mom (and dad) can have a nap. Or a shower. Or eat something. Sometimes I cook, or do meal prep, or make snacks, since it is at times hard to even remember about eating when there is so much going on with baby at any given moment. I can fold laundry, do the dishes, or just sweep the floor when a mom feels like feeling that grit on her toes might just put her over the edge for what she can handle that day. I can help moms and partners recognize baby's cues for getting ready to eat. Or sleep. I can run to the store and get stuff when moms don't feel like adding that to the mix. Or be with the baby if she feels like she needs to get out of the house. Or show her how to use that crazy long piece of fabric so she can wear her baby and have two free hands when I leave instead of just one.

I can just listen.

I can just sit and listen. Sometimes that is the most important part of my job. Listening to the ups and downs of becoming and mom and a dad and reminding families, "There is no right answer. You have to decide what works best for YOU."

Support in the postpartum period is crucial for bonding with baby, and having strong moms and dads. This is just the small part that I get to play in it:)

PPSM. YOU need to know about this.

http://www.pregnancypostpartumsupportmn.com/

Every mom in Minnesota needs to know about this resource. Postpartum Support MN is a wonderful organization that exists to help moms find the help that they need in the postpartum period. Why do mom's need to know this? Because postpartum depression is very common these days. What exactly IS postpartum depression? It can come out in lots of ways-- sadness, not bonding well with baby, anger, anxiety, feeling overwhelmed.... If you are really being real with yourself-- every mom probably experiences at least some of these feelings on SOME level.

PPSM has a mission that every mom experience the OPTIMAL levels of emotional health and well-being after having a baby. Who wouldn't want that?

Please check them out and use them as a resource.

They also have a warm line-- leave a message and someone will get back to you with a resource, professional or just a listening ear within 24 hours. It's simple. Every mom AND dad deserves this kind of support postpartum.

I also want to make note-- it IS fairly common for partners to experience some postpartum depression as well. This is also a huge transition for them. They can also use this for support!

What I've Been Up To Lately.

I know I have been a major slacker with blogging lately. Just wanted to give you all a quick update about where things are at with me, as there are exciting new changes happening with my practice as a doula. 

First, I recently took the postpartum doula training through DONA. I was priveleged to study under Debra-Pascali Bonaro-- a world renowned birth and postpartum doula. She is the creator of the Orgasmic Birth book/documentary. If you haven't read it/seen it, I highly recommend it. 

The Postpartum Training I did with her was fabulous, and I learned so much from the many women that surrounded me that week.

I have now moved into full time birth and postparum doula work. I am LOVING every minute of it, and hope to devote more time to blogging again in the near future. 

Also, coming up, I will be taking the Healthy Children Lactation Counselor Training, which will allow me to counsel women in breastfeeding better than I can now. I am looking forward to attending that mid may!

This summer I will have so much more I want to share in regards to postpartum and lactation. More wonderful things to come!

What to Do When Everyone Has Something To Say About Your Choices.

There are so many decisions to be made when you are expecting a baby. Where to have your baby, and which provider to choose. Cloth or disposable diapers. Crib or co-sleeper. Breast milk or formula. And, it is guaranteed that everyone will have something to say about it. 

This is the time when people are developed into parents. This is not the first time you will experience these kinds of pressures. It will happen again as you choose how to parent your child, which school you will send them to, what house rules you have. Now is the time to set yourself apart as a confident decision maker. How do you do this? Why, use your BRAIN, of course. You can use this prenatally, postnatally, or in your everyday life. I use this for things as simple as choosing between which restaurant we will go to for dinner. 

This is a common acronym used in the birth world:

B- What are the Benefits of choosing to do something, or not?

R-What are the Risks of choosing to do something, or not?

A-What are your Alternative options?

I-What does your INTUITION tell you? What is your gut feeling saying about doing something or not?

N-What happens Next if you choose to follow through with this, and what happens if you choose to do Nothing?

This little acronym may be your best friend as you navigate the world of being new parents. Really, I want to highlight that it is important, above all, to especially trust your INTUITION here. Your gut feeling can tell you so much if a decision is right for you or not. Pay attention to that little voice inside of you. It matters. Let it speak up. That is the first rule of good parenting. Listen to what your intuition is saying. It may not be right for others. It may not be something that your mother or mother in law did or didn't do. But it is right for you. That matters. You can be confident about that. 

Listen to your intuition in the birth process. Move where and how your body wants to move. Make noises like you feel so inclined to make. When you bring baby home. You can trust your intuition. It is there for a reason. 

People may not agree. They may not like what you have decided. But how can they argue with, "We thought about and researched our options, and this is what felt the most right for our family." Try it. 

I would love to hear other people's ideas on how they share with others the choices they make for their families.

Hypnosis for Birth.

Photo courtesy of: http://gabinorment.typepad.com/.a/6a0133ec8deafb970b014e86dfd31c970d-pi

If you have been reading my blog for any amount of time, you know that I am completely pro-hypnosis for birth. I'm going to toot this horn again. Hypnosis is such an effective comfort measure that anyone can use. I encourage this in my doula practice now, by talking with families about developing their own matras for birth. Hypnosis is a simple concept, and many of us experience it daily-- it's like those times that you drive home, and you forget how you ended up there.  This same thing can happen in the birth process when we practice relaxation so often that it comes easily to us when we need it the most. I often use hypnosis in my everyday life to help me alleviate stressors.  How do I do this?

I close my eyes (if I am not driving), and take some deep breaths in through my nose and down into my belly, letting it balloon full of air. Then I give an audible, open-mouth exhale. I take time to focus on my breathing. Then I visualize my special place. In my special place, I am a little girl, it is a bright and sunny day, and I am swinging in my backyard, the breeze is blowing my hair, the air is crip and refreshing, and clean pure air fills up my lungs. I envision myself swinging and swinging and swinging. With each swinging movement, I soften one more group of muscles in my body-- from the top of my head, down to my toes, until the tension is gone, and I am feeling better.

This is easy for me now. Because I am practiced at it.

You can enjoy this too. If you practice.

If you are looking into different childbirth preparation courses, I would highly recommend looking into one that places a lot of emphasis on relaxation and hypnosis techniques, such as Hypnobirthing or Hypnobabies. If you haven't yet seen a hypnobirth, you can watch one here.

In January, I am taking the Hypnobirthing Doula Training, and I can't wait to take the Hypnobabies doula training. I would love to support more families who choose to use this for their birth journey. It is such a beautiful thing.

Birth #0042

My oh my. It has been far too long since I last shared something with you all!

This birth story is shared with the permission and consent of the birthing Momma. 

This family was scheduled for an induction due to this momma's health. They began the process in the evening with a pill that was placed on her cervix. Overnight, she had some contractions, but they got closer with the second dose of the pill around 3am. By morning, she was about 2cm dilated, and 75% effaced. This momma and daddy spent the morning walking the halls and trying some different positions with the ball, standing and swaying, and also resting.

A few hours later, she is now 3cm open, and they have placed a foley catheter bulb on her cervix. Shortly after they placed it-- about 30-40 minutes later, contractions became much more intense, and the momma threw up, feeling nauseated.  Soon after this, the foley catheter fell out. The nurse informed her that this means her cervix is open to at least 4cm now. This is about the time that I was asked to join them at the hospital.

Shortly after this, I arrived to meet them. Immediately, I noticed that they had done a wonderful job of creating a calming a home-y atmosphere. She is doing beautifully, standing and leaning over the ball on the bed, with him sitting right behind her squeezing her hips. She is very relaxed and calm. Both of them are very positive and seeming to enjoy this time as much as possible. They have soft music in the background, and Dad gently massages her back in between contractions. She is beginning to feel more contractions on her left side and He often gives pressure there to offer her relief.

By mid afternoon, this momma is really enjoying using warm compresses on her left side, has been standing and swaying, and walked the halls. I used my Rebozo scarf some to help lift up her belly while walking the halls. Then we went back to the room and rested for a bit; I gave her a hand massage. Now, she says she is feeling like her contractions have spaced out a bit and that she wants to use more upright positions to help things come on stronger.


First, I suggested trying a side-lying pelvic floor release. Dad and I both assisted this momma as she was lying on her side to gradually release each leg and release her pelvic floor muscles.

In the late afternoon, her doctor came in to check her progress. She is now 5cm open, baby has now moved down to -1 station, and she is 80% effaced. She recommends breaking this momma's bag of waters to help things move along. This momma thought about it and agreed to do that.

When her bag was broken, she had a lot of fluid! The fluid is clear, meaning baby is doing well; there is no meconium present.

In just an hour, contractions have stepped up in intensity and are much closer together now. This momma is still coping beautifully. Breathing gently through each one, very relaxed and calm. She is doing perfect. Some low back pain now, and she has requested some hip squeezes. Now, this momma is dangling over the top of the bed and enjoying that position.

Things have continued to become more intense. This momma's contractions are longer now, and they come about every 3-4 minutes. She moans in a low voice through each one, swaying back and forth. Dad and I take turns pressing into her hips.

Now this momma decided to try getting in the tub, which seemed to help her rest well for a while. Then she got out of the tub and resumed standing near the bed, often leaning over the ball, and swaying through her contractions. She is visibly more and more inwardly focused as she moves through her labor, strong and centered, and excellent at relaxing despite the increasing intensity.

By night, the doctor came in to check progress once more. She is now open to 6cm, baby has moved down to 0 station, and her cervix is 90% effaced. The doctor proposed two options-- either continuing for another hour and rechecking progress, or starting a low dose of pitocin to encourage things to move along. This momma and dad talked it over and decided to start pitocin. 

The nurse reminded this momma that moving from 5cm (where the foley bulb helped open her to) to 6cm was great progress on her own and that now she would likely be seeing more change moving forward. I also gently reminded them both that the baby moving down and the cervix thinning were both great signs of progress, and that needed to happen before her cervix can continue to open.

In just over an hour, Pitocin is started. This momma continues to be a pillar of strength! Sitting on the ball, and draped over a mountain of pillows, she closes her eyes, and almost appears to be sleeping she is so relaxed. Dad is close by her side, always ready to give a word of encouragement, or a kind and gentle touch. He is always anticipating her needs just as she says them aloud. They are such a great team!

One hour into pitocin, things have greatly intensified. Now, this momma is feeling like she would like pain relief from an epidural. She threw up again. She said she is feeling some low pressure. I asked this momma if she thought she would like to be checked before getting medication, but she declined, and requested the nurse order an epidural for her.

Meanwhile, she needed to have a bag of IV fluids (this is a routine procedure) before she could receive the epidural. This momma decided to try sitting on the toilet to wait while getting her fluids, feeling that she may need to "poop". She was able to relax better for some of her contractions, but was still very ready for the epidural.

Soon, the anesthesiologist arrived. This momma curled around her pillows on the edge of the bed, and Dad stood close, holding her through the intensity. During the placement, this momma's low moaning began to turn into grunting.

After the epidural was placed, she said that she was experiencing a lot of burning, and felt like he was "going to come out any minute."

The nurse suggested allowing the epidural to work a little longer before having the doctor come and recheck her and also before starting pushing.

Just 20 minutes later the doctor came in. This momma is complete, and baby has already moved down A LOT! to +2/+3 station.

She started pushing right away, and it did not take her long to get the hang of it. She was moving him with every push!! Within an hour, this baby boy emerged. He was beautiful and healthy, and everyone was so happy to meet him.

Dad asked Momma right after, "So was it worth it?" and Momma said, "Of course!!"

Birth #0038

This story has been shared with the consent and permission of the birthing Momma.

Early in the morning, just one day before this momma's due date, I got a call from her saying that her bag of waters had broken and contractions were a bit spaced out. She said she wanted to try to go back to sleep for a little while. I agreed that was a good idea, and this momma said she would call to update when things started changing.

Just over two hours later, the father called to say that things seemed closer together now, contractions ranging between 3-7 minutes apart. This is always my cue that things are ramping-up for the momma-- when she has her partner call and talk with me because she is unable to. He told me she was wanting to go to the hospital soon, and that she was starting to mention the "D" word. When I asked for clarification, and he whispered into the phone, "drugs." She had tried being on her hands and knees, taking a bath, and having her partner do hip squeezes to help alleviate some back pain. He said they were waiting for a call back from the midwife. 

I asked to talk with this momma for a while. I do this so I can get a sense of what is happening and where things are at. A mother deep in labor land sounds and emotes differently than a mother still in early labor. She was in the middle of a contraction, breathing slowly and easily through her contractions, even moaning some. In between contractions, she told me that she had been starting to feel the urge to push. Then I could hear on the phone during contractions that she was making little grunts. I calmly suggested that it was sounding to me like it may be a good time to go to the hospital. Again, I spoke with the husband and partner, and he agreed that it seemed like a good time to go, and that they felt like they would be fine to make it there without my help as the sister of the birthing momma was with them and could help them load up their stuff and get to the hospital. I hurried to get out the door and meet them. 

Just four hours after the first call, I met them at the hospital and this momma was coping BEAUTIFULLY. Deep breathing, and sometimes moaning through contractions. Her husband and partner was right by her side, so affectionate, supportive and always whispering encouraging words into her ear. She was lying on her right side in bed so they could monitor the baby for a little bit. At this point they found out that water birth and delayed cord clamping may not be an option as there was some meconium present when the water broke. The birthing momma seemed okay with that.

The nurses stepped out of the room for a little bit and this momma really seemed to be starting to bear down during her contractions. The nurse was called back in and said the midwife was on her way up and would check her when she arrived. When she did arrive, she checked and said that she was 7-8cm dilated, and about 80% effaced, baby at 0 station. The midwife said that the cervix was swollen, and that as much as possible, she should try to breathe and avoid bearing down as much as possible.

She did great at that, despite the challenge it presented! She was using short little breaths, and also using "horsey lips" to help relax. We got some cold cloths to put on her neck and shoulders, as she was starting to feel very hot. The baby's heart rate was dipping a little bit with contractions. Now she tried being on her left side, and also hands and knees. The midwife thought that being on her hands and knees may help the baby to change positions, and also may help her urge to push. She tried hands and knees for a few contractions.

In just one more hour, the midwife rechecked her and she was 9.5 cm!! There was just a small lip of cervix left. She had this momma breathe through two more contractions, and told her she could start pushing. She said that baby was now at +2 station!

It was incredible to watch this new mother and father work together as a team. He was always near, always encouraging her, telling her that he loved her, reminding her how strong she was, keeping her cool with cold cloths, and stroking her hair, giving her kisses, helping her sit up and curl around so she could push as strong as she could.

The midwife and I took turns applying cold compresses on her hemorrhoids. The momma said this helped. The "grandma" (the birthing momma's mom) had arrived earlier, and would often come over and give her kisses and whisper words into her ear. Grandma always stayed close by and was video taping the birth, her sister was helping hold up her leg when it was time to push with a contraction. There was a whole team of people supporting and cheering this momma on!

Within the next hour, the baby's head was crowning. Everyone was so excited! The nurse called in the Neo-Natal specialist to be available just in case the baby was having trouble breathing because of the meconium. Very shortly, the whole baby was emerging (10:03am)! He gave a very LOUD cry, and could be placed on his momma's chest right away (had he not cried loudly, they would have had to immediately clamp the cord, and take him to see the Neo-Natal specialist at the warmer in the room). There were lots of tears of joy, and lots of laughter because the baby kept crying for so long. He was doing great, and everyone was thankful he was healthy, here, and safe!

Why I love what I do.

On Sunday morning, I got home from my longest birth yet. I was with a laboring mom for 54 hours, and she labored for 76. It was a beautiful birth, and she made it through most of her birthing time with the mantra, "You can do anything for one minute," referring to the length of a contraction. That got her through 76 hours. She was amazing. Women are amazing.

I continually stand in awe of how women transform into being mothers during this time so many refer to as "labor". It is a completely vulnerable time, in which a woman utterly depends on the assistance and constant attention from her birth team. She needs consoling, massaging, coaching as she breathes, reminders to relax, let go and trust the process. She needs to be comforted. Not necessarily with medication. She needs support to be empowered. This changes her as a mother.

I love something I just saw a fellow doula, Cynthya Dzialo, Instagram. It was a poster from CAPPA (another doula certifying organization) which reads: "An epidural provides pain relief during labor; it does not provide mothers emotional, physical and emotional support. That would be a DOULA."

In a recent postpartum discussion I was having with a momma, we were reflecting on how interesting it is that in labor a mother must be doted on continuously, with reminders to eat and drink, and encouraged to use the bathroom, and change positions to get comfortable. She needs to have her hair stroked, and to be told everything is okay. Maybe even sung to, or swayed with, or tucked in with warm blankets. This isn't that far off from how we need to treat a newborn baby. If mothers don't receive this kind of compassionate care when they most need it, how will they know to respond to their helpless newborn, who can't communicate in words, but only has basic needs that need to be attended to in order to be nurtured and grow up to be peaceful and compassionate people?

I'm not sure how they can. I can't promise that my work as a doula is creating world peace, but maybe it's a start. I'd like to think so.